Live Well

Life is short; enjoy it and live well.  Life brings with it good times and bad times.   

Regardless of what life may bring, you can live well if you count your blessings.  Be grateful for each bright sunrise, for the rain drops that touch your skin and make you feel refreshed; be thankful for every birthday that increases your maturity.  It may be hard, but do your best to stay positive.   This attitude will help anyone overcome life’s challenges.  Positivity is contagious so live your life well by spreading positivism. 

To live well is to always say the three simple words, I love you, and mean it.  These three simple words weigh a ton.  It comforts a child who tripped and hurt himself, it eases the school stress of your teenage daughter, it brings assurance to your aging parents, etc.  Though your family and friends know that you love them, saying these three simple words mean the world to them.  Never miss a chance to say “I love you”, it will mean a lot to the person you say them to. 

In my childhood days, I love to play and bathe in the rain.  There is nothing wrong with being a child once again.  Relive the sensation of playing in the rain; be a child again and enjoy life just the way it is.

Always make time for your family in friends.  A short phone call or an SMS  just to let them know you remember them will do wonders to your relationship.  Do your best to be present in family gatherings and activities most specially your children’s activities.  Children will not stay young forever; enjoy them while you can and while they allow you to do so.  

Give your best in your endeavors.  If you don’t, you will be cheating yourself  and will never know what you are capable of doing.  If you don’t give your best in your endeavors, you will live always thinking “what if?”

Accept your mistakes and ask for forgiveness.  Making mistakes is just human;  all of us make mistakes, no one is perfect.  Being humble will not kill you.  On the contrary, being humble will earn you respect and friendship. 

Keep dreaming; life is too short to give up your dreams. In this day and age, nothing is free, except dreams.  You don’t have to pay anything when you dream; keep life’s excitement with your dreams.  Live your life  full and rejuvenated with your dreams.

Life is too short to keep a frown on your face. It takes more muscles to frown than to smile.  Keep that smile on your face.  Like yawning and positivity, smiling is contagious.  Watch people’s reaction as you smile at them.  Brighten up someone’s day with a contagious smile and help them to live well.

Let It Go!

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Trust me, this is worth your while.  Enjoy :)

Resiliency

We all have our setback experiences – relationship, health, finances; name it, no one is excused.  The way we react to setbacks determines our character and our ability to become winners.  Resiliency is marked by the ability to bounce back from any setback.  Resiliency is marked by the attitude to consider setbacks as challenges and opportunities instead of problems and failures. Resilient people think differently and possess certain skills that allow them to persevere, manage stress and become an overcomer. Some of these skills may be innate but some can be learned.

Resilient people are confident; they are at peace with their humanity.  Their experiences and mistakes have humbled them; they’ve accepted their own vulnerability.  They admit their imperfection but don’t allow imperfections to hinder them.  Making mistakes is not “failure” but they learn from these mistakes and use the learning to create positive outcomes.

Resilient people are dynamic thinkers.  Like everyone of us, resilient people struggle with negative thoughts.  Their difference is that resilient people immediately realize that negative thoughts result to negative outcome.  Thus, resilient people immediately switch gears toward positive thoughts. Instead of jumping to conclusions and making assumptions, resilient people would gather the facts and find ways to move around issues and face the challenge head on. When things are not working, resilient people will make adjustments until they are satisfied with the result.  They are challenged to look for means that are within their control and they work on that control. We all have our innate talents and strengths. Resilient people use these strengths to overcome issues in their life. A resilient person diagnosed with cancer will not wallow in pity and defeat but will change his lifestyle, consult experts, change his eating habits, etc. to recover from his illness.  Resilient people are dynamic thinkers; they look for ways to fight any issues in life.

Resilient people are optimistic.  Without optimism, you can’t bounce back from setbacks; pessimism will chain you in darkness and defeat. Resilient people don’t give up.  They look for the rainbow in the storm.  Their attitude is that they will overcome, they will get through the issue and that the issue will soon pass.  Thus it is easier for a resilient person to bounce back from a divorce or get over the loss of a loved one.

Resilient people know that they can’t do it alone.  They reach out to friends and family to seek help.  They understand that it is not “weakness” to ask for help; they are not too proud to admit that they need help.  Vice-versa, resilient people reach out to help those in need. Resilient people understand that there is strength in unity; there is strength when you know that people are available to help you.

Life Purpose

We all have our own purpose in life.  God created us for a purpose; He has a wonderful plan for each and everyone of us.  The key to success, happiness and fulfillment is to find and do your life purpose.  

 

To find your purpose in life, you need to recognize that you do have one.  I believe that we had a glimpse of our life purpose when we were young, probably in the toddler to early teens (5 to 15 years of age).  At this age, you were interested and excelling in certain talents and skills.  It could be singing, dancing, mathematics, cooking, drawing, etc. You just felt that you have a certain unique ability and are drawn to doing and learning more of that specific craft. You find joy everytime you engage in that certain activity.  You excel in that specific skill.

 

It may be that years have passed yet your talent and skill was kept inside of you.  Though with interest and passion, you somehow did not become what you envisioned you will be.  If this is the case, do not lose hope; it is never too late to re-discover your life purpose.  Ray Kroc, founder of the global McDonald’s franchise, was 52 when he finally discovered his life purpose.  Before building his McDonald’s empire, he worked as a jazz pianist, waiter and salesman.  Harland “Colonel” Sanders was 65 when he launched the Kentucky Fried Chicken franchise. 

 

Stop living another person’s dream; it won’t work no matter how hard you try.  Your parents would probably influence you to pursue their own dream but each of us are created uniquely and thus have our own individual life purpose.  No matter how you love your parents and desire to please them, you cannot live their dream for them.  You need to think seriously of what your life purpose is and avoid being influenced or dictated by people around you.

 

What do you love to do that time passes by without your notice?  Do you love cooking?  Perhaps, it gives you so much joy to cook and bake. You feel happy because you believe you make other people happy with the food you prepare.  Perhaps, you can spend your whole day writing stories or drawing.  If you are employed, probably you find joy and excitement in creating marketing events for your company.  When you do such activities, you don’t feel that you are working at all.  You just have the passion to think creatively and put these ideas into action.  Think of the things you enjoy doing, things that inspire you and start developing these skills and talents.

 

In evaluating you life’s purpose, it is also important to think how your life purpose could impact the people around you.  It is in noble deeds that we find the greatest satisfaction.  If your life purpose is to entertain people by your unique imaginative story book, let it be. It will give you extreme satisfaction as you fulfill this life purpose because you not only benefit yourself but you bring joy to other people as well.

Turn Your Kids into Readers

Gone were the days when kids take so much enjoyment in reading.  Back then, kids would consume anything from fantasy, history, adventure and even romantic novels. Today, technology and gadgets make it difficult to convince kids that reading is good for them; that reading expands their knowledge, improves their vocabulary and reading is an enjoyable recreation.

The growing popularity of social media has taken kids away from books and into the world of internet where they spend hours either chatting or playing with friends and even people they don’t know personally, people based in the other side of the world.  The numerous games played on gadgets and online keep kids busy and obsessed in winning.

It cannot be argued that literacy is one of the highest predictors for the future success of our kids.  Thus, it is unfortunate that more and more kids (especially boys) are falling behind in reading. To address this declining interest of children in books, moms should help by using the following techniques I used to encourage my own children to read and enjoy reading.

Sometimes, we treat our children the way to treat adults.  Adults would normally read books in the comfort of their favorite chair or on the bed just before bedtime.  But do you know that kids are more adventurous than we are?  Some would read under the table or some would read on the floor.  Allow your kids to read in any place they prefer.  This place is a comfortable and fun place where they will enjoy reading a book.

Do not force your kids to read a book; coax them but never demand.  Your kid might find it difficult to read a book, forcing him will further reduce his interest in reading.  Your role is to help your kid go through the process, encouraging him every time to ensure that you will keep his interest.  Be available as he reads a book and ask him to raise his finger or hand if he does not understand a certain word in his book.  Some kids refuse to raise a hand because they feel that they are in school and the classroom atmosphere is not conducive for their reading enjoyment. Reading for fun can be different from reading because you are required to. If that is the case, ask your child to raise a finger or develop your secret signs so you will be able to guide him in his difficulty. If he has difficulty pronouncing a certain word or he stutters, let him read the same passage several times.

 

This brings me to say that though it is time saving to have a reading time with all your kids at the same time, it is still best to have a one-on-one reading session with your kid to boost his enjoyment of reading.  This way you can focus all your attention to him.  The more a child feels well attended, the more he will excel in his reading.

Never compare your kids with their siblings; the same is true when it comes to their reading abilities. Comparison not only makes a child cautious and therefore will not try to read difficult books; it also promotes put-down amongst siblings when you are not around.

Allow your toddlers to hold the book and turn the pages. Holding the book gives them confidence and the power to turn the pages gets them excited. 

Use these basic steps to turn your kids into readers and get them a step up the ladder of success.

Going Back to the Drawing Board

I was a planner.  The moment I learned to read and write, I started dreaming… I started planning.  I would scribble notes about my dreams and plans for my future.  I would write short-term and long-term goals.  That habit stopped when my most important plan in life got derailed. At that very moment, everything stood still, everything turned black! I told myself I am not going back to the drawing board because it is useless to plan in this chaotic world.

Why plan when nothing is predictable?  Our world today has more uncertainties than ever before; today’s world is a chaos.  We live in uncertainties – relationships, jobs, businesses.  Writing down life goals is a futile exercise; I will be content with the general fact of what I want in life - happy relationship with my kids, meaningful work, making more money.

Years passed and I received menial results from my efforts; I wasn’t going anywhere.  It finally dawned on me that my efforts are turning in mediocre results because I am not specific to what I want in life; I wasn’t planning.  Hence, I picked up my pen and paper (my iPod) and wrote down my thoughts, my plans.  I went back to my drawing board.

A clear plan encourages you to get out of bed in the morning.  It gives you a purpose; it motivates you to take action.   A specific plan is the reason why we do what we do.  A clear plan focuses us to what we want to achieve; it drives us forward to our goal.  A clear plan kills procrastination and complacency.

We suffer so much stress because of the uncertainly around us. A clear and written plan takes away our focus from our uncertain world to the certainty of our hopes and desires. A written plan makes our goals look more realistic.  As we read our plan, it gives us the will power to run after these goals and dreams despite the chaos of this world.  Our plan gives us the strength to carry on whatever hindrances we may face.  We write our plan on a paper (iPod), not on stone.  If plan A does not work, we can have plan B and so on till we reach our goal.  What is important is that we draft a plan for our goal.

Writing down your plan gives it life; it breathes the air of hope into your life.   As you put action into your plan, every small step gives you a feeling that you are making progress.  This is the air of hope that gives you the feeling that you are getting closer to your goal no matter how small the step may be.   You start to feel good about yourself and get more encouraged and more determined to achieve your goal.  This small step is more powerful than the actual achievement of your goal because it is this small step that propelled you to reach your goal.

Writing down your plan focuses your energy into something productive.   Writing down a plan takes your mind off the negative thoughts – worrying about things that you can’t control.  We easily get distracted by chaos around us – gossips in the office, relationship issues, problems at home.  Writing down your plan will take your mind away from these negative thoughts and focus your energy into something more beneficial for your future.

Writing down your plan helps you go through the tough times in life.  No one is exempted from the tough times in life.  Fame, fortune, beauty nor health cannot shield you from the facts of life - tough times. Losing a job, divorce, financial crisis, relationship issue or even the daily troubles at home can ruin your future.  But if you have your plan well written, you can set your sight in the future and make the present a little more bearable.  You can say to your present situation that it is a challenge, an opportunity to make your future better and brighter.  Your plan will remind you that this tough moment will make you a stronger and better person. You will overcome it because you have a goal to achieve.

Writing down your plan helps you go through the tough times in life.  I realized this much later, but I am glad I did.  I am glad that I am now back in my drawing board.

A Champion

Life is all about choices.  Within each one of us resides two persons – the victim and the champion.   Which one would you choose to be?  Being a single mom doesn’t automatically make you a victim; you can choose to be a champion (if you are not yet a champion).  I have met a lot of single moms and they are all champions.  Check out the traits of these champion single moms.

 

A champion is resilient.  No matter what negative things life throws at a champion, she keeps bouncing back.  She may lie down for awhile after the blow, but she sure will stand up and continue the fight.  A champion uses the experience to harness her power and begin to create the life she desires amidst the hardships. She is like a beach ball that when pressed down in the water, the harder is the force exerted that makes the beach ball rise above the water.  

 

A champion is an action woman.  She thinks, plans, and makes a move.  She always has a purpose and a sense of urgency.  She doesn’t sit on her dreams or issues.  She acts on them and makes sure she implements something everyday that will take her closer to her goal.

 

A champion is persistent.  Life presents a lot of issues, rejections, and delays.  Despite all these hindrances, a champion persists.  She keeps knocking on the door, taking alternative courses of action till she reaches her goal.  Her battle cry is “Never say no”.  She regards the hindrances as opportunities that will take her one step closer to her goal.  She always thinks, “What if my goal is just one more step away.  She dreads the thought of what will happen if she did not give up.  Thus, she keeps trying and keeps on pursuing.

 

A champion is a focused positive thinker.  She agrees with Napoleon Hill’s expression, “What the mind of man can conceive and believe, it can achieve”.  You just need to focus on what you want your body to do and it will follow.  A champion focuses on the positive things, on the solution.  She does not dwell on the problems because if you focus on the problem it will be magnified.  But if you focus on the solution, you will solve your problem.  Your mind will keep on thinking of the solution and magnify it till it solves the problem. If you focus on how you want to live your life, your mind will block out things that distracts you from our goal.

 

An ideal trait of a champion is that she is disciplined.  She designs a regimen for her success and she does it religiously.  If her formula is to start her day with a prayer followed by exercise then an uninterrupted three hour work on her computer for her internet marketing business, she does it without fail.  We become what we repeatedly do.  If you want to maintain a healthy mind and body, you discipline yourself to eat the right food and the right quantity coupled with exercise.  Without discipline, you will not achieve what you want in life.  Without discipline, you can never be a champion.