Do You Feel Responsible?

Do you feel responsible for what happens in your life? Or do you believe that what happens in your life is outside your control? Do you feel you cannot do anything about it?

I can’t emphasize it more…the life of a single mom is difficult. At the initial stage there will be a lot of passing on the blame.  You blame the environment, your family, your ex and everything else except you. Have you ever considered that you were part of the problem? Have you considered that you were responsible for what has taken place? It could be that you were not responsible for the entire situation but you took part in it. You are responsible for allowing yourself to be a victim. You are responsible for not  taking action or immediately taking an action. You are responsible for your response.

Psychologists say that people who take responsibility for what happens in their life inhibit the internal locus of control, while those who blame others when something goes wrong in their life inhibit the external locus of control. Research reveals that people who inhibit the internal locus of control or those who take a personal responsibility on what happens in their life are more content. They are able to move on after the bad event. They are likely to learn from the bad things that happened in their life; they grow, mature and improve. They become stronger in facing the struggles in life and become a source of inspiration to others. They are able to impact the lives of other people; not just their own families.

To take responsibility for what happens in your life is a choice; it is one of the many choices that life offers.  Taking responsibility for what happens in your life doesn’t mean that you are in control of your life. No human being can be in control of everything. Only God is in control of everything.

To take responsibility means being responsible for yourself and the choices that you make. It means being responsible for your actions in the specific situation you are in. To take responsibility means acknowledging your mistakes and learning from these mistakes.

Do not put the blame on other people for what has happened to you. Rather, acknowledge that you had a part in it. Regardless of the degree of your participation, you took part in it. Learn to accept the responsibility for the things you can control. This will accelerate your learning process. This will accelerate the true healing process. This will help you forgive and will help you move on.