Moving Forward

Single moms need all the encouragement they can get to move on after the drastic event in their life.  They need to move forward to ensure a better future for their children.  Their children of course are the primary motivators that would help them to move forward but single moms, especially the new single moms, can always use a few tips on how to move forward.

1. 1.  Think like a winner.  You are not a loser; you still are a winner because you will become stronger, more confident, smarter and wise because of your experience. This is the empowerment that you can derive from your past. You have gained wisdom that you can teach your children when it is their turn to go into a relationship. Winning is not just about being the number one but a winner is someone who has learned from her experience.  A winner thinks ahead.  A winner competes against herself; a winner strives to always improve herself.

2.      Be honest with yourself, feel the pain but do not wallow in it. Because if you do, you will suffer. Remember that suffering is optional.  You can choose to get up and turn your world around.  Nothing lasts forever. The pain will go away if you do not nourish it.  Pain stays only if you dramatize it.  You need to resist pain. Quit asking yourself the same old questions over and over - “Why did it have to be me? Why did I not see it coming?”  Quit saying, “This is not fair!  I can’t move on.  I’m hurt!” Quit the mental drama and start facing the new day.   

3.      Forgive yourself and your ex.  Forgiveness is the best antidote to pain.  Let go of the resentment and the guilt.  What’s done is done so forgive yourself for the things you think you should have done during the relationship. Stop hating your ex. Teach your mind and your heart to forget. Stop reminiscing the past – good and bad memories alike.   

4.      Focus only on the present.  The present is a gift.  Today is an opportunity to start a new beginning.  You have the power to do what you want to accomplish today and the power to influence the future with your actions today. Live today, live the moment and look forward to the future.