To Marry or Not?

To marry or not to marry, this is a question that gets a lot of single moms thinking. 

The life of a single mom is definitely difficult.  One of the most pressing issues we face is money.  In most cases, single moms want to solve this issue immediately.  Who wouldn’t?  You need to feed your kids, send them to school, clothe them and give them shelter.  Of course, you need to find an immediate solution to your money problem.  Sometimes, single moms think that the easiest and fastest way to solve this issue is to find a mate that could provide them the finances they need. 

I will not blame single moms who think and act this way.  They are pressured and sometimes, they fail to think logically.  And because of this, they say yes to the first guy they meet who seem capable of fulfilling their immediate need for money. But finding a mate to solve your money problems is not a solution.  Rather, it could add to your already numerous problems.

Avoid marrying on the rebound.  Should you get back on the dating scene, take it slow and easy. 

First of all you need to be sure that you are dating for the right reason.  That is, you want a serious relationship and your goal is to re-marry because you want someone to share your life with.  You are dating for love.  

Are you ready to love again?  You need to be prepared because love, as you know, does not always bring happiness. There could be sad moments… again.  Will you be able to handle this?

Before you even start dating, examine yourself if you are ready.  Are you completely healed from the pain? Have you forgiven yourself and your ex?  Are you sure that you don’t carry excess baggage (hurt, resentment, anger) that could be detrimental to your new relationship?

Have you weighed the pros and cons?  Are you sure that your children will be happy with your decision to start dating?  Will they benefit from your decision?

Do you have the time and energy?  Single moms are very busy – caring for their kids and earning an income.  If you don’t have the time and the energy, I suggest you put your dating plan to a pause.  To develop a good relationship you need to invest on time and energy.

Here’s to an uncomplicated life J