Overcome Fear

One of the most common problems faced by single moms is fear. It is fear of the past,  the present and even the future. The past ordeal is like a ghost that haunts our every waking hour.  Because of our damaged self image, we fear that we are not capable of taking care of our children and we can't earn enough money to provide for their needs. We tend to cower like a child as these thoughts come to mind. Single moms are afraid of the future.  They are worried of what the future may bring to their children.

The past events of hurt and pain brought about by physical abuse, psychological abuse, betrayal, etc. are memories that keep flooding our minds. Because of damaged self image single moms fear their ability to adapt to their new role.  They are stricken with panic and anxiety attacks everyday. They worry about child care, food, clothing and shelter. They fear that they might not be able to provide the physical and emotional needs of their children.  They fear failing as a single mom. Fear of the unknown and the uncertainty can be paralyzing causing single moms to further slip into depression.  You need to overcome these fears.  There are ways to control your fear.

First of all, you need to calm yourself.  Panic will confuse your brain and will prevent you from seeing or thinking of solutions.  You need to calm down to enable you to think clearly and logically. To maintain your coolness, do not dramatize the past. Quit thinking about it and soon you will be able to forget the past.

When you are calm, you can start thinking of solutions to your problems.  Now is the perfect time to make a plan.  Put down your plan in ink and paper.  It is best to do this as you can always come back to it to check your progress and make changes if needed. Plan things according to the order of their importance. For instance, finding an affordable house, a care center for your kids, a better paying job, buying a car (used) to get around in, etc. is a logical program of activities. Make a plan to manage your new home set-up.  Organize your daily activities from child care, to housework to your job.

After listing your plan, lift them up to the Lord.  Prayer eases fears. When your plan is submitted to God, it gives you the assurance that you will be able to go through your situation.

Work with a mentor, confidante or an accountability partner. Your mentor will be able to give you advices and will be there to support you.  Your confidante will listen to you as you speak your fears.  Your accountability partner will remind you of the steps you’ve decided to take to ease and erase your fears.

Maintain a positive attitude.  Be thankful in all things and you will find peace.

Fear is like a prison.  It prevents you from going out into the world and accomplishing things that will improve your life.  It steals your freedom, it plunders your hope.  Fear is the destroyer of dreams and future. Never let fear rule your life, do not allow fear to imprison you; overcome fear!